Do Christians disagree? Why? On this side of heaven, disagreement will be a part of our lives. The main characters in the account include, Paul the apostle to the Gentiles and Barnabas who is also known as Joseph from Cyprus. He has the other title of being the "Son of Encouragement". Both were highly respected and Barnabas was the one who first took Paul under his wings in his early days as an apostle. They had gone on a mission together the first time with John Mark and the pair has always been referred to as Barnabas and Paul. But later on, Luke began to refer to them as Paul and Barnabas to signify a change of leadership. Paul increasingly became recognized as the Leader. After the first journey, there was the suggestion to re-visit the cities that they had gone to in their first trip. However, they could not agree about who they should bring along with them. John Mark had deserted them at Pamphylia earlier in Acts 13:30 probably because of the hardship and persecutions, he quitted. The sharp disagreement between the two led to a split and that was probably the last time we hear about John Mark and Barnabas in Acts. We are told then that Paul took Silas in his second missionary journey.Conflicts abound when people work together. It happens even among the most godly leaders. As we work closely with one another, over time, we are bound to experience differences of opinion where we would offend and irritate each other. These differences bring us into conflicts with each other whether between husbands and wives, between different church members. The internal and external stresses that we encounter complicate matters and hinder our abilities to resolve our differences. And unresolved conflicts then stay that way, hindering our ability to work with each other.
It is important to recognize conflicts as a fact of life. They can become destructive only if we will let them develop on an unhealthy course. If only we can learn how to harness such times to draw us closer to each other.
The disagreements were described as being sharp, that means that it was a major clash of convictions about who will be involved. Perhaps heated words were exchanged causing them to be hostile to each other. Both parties refuse to back them. These could be disagreements about doctrines, styles of worship, women in leadership, whether one can drink alcohol? These can lead to conflicts with people who do not hold the same convictions as us.
Paul was concerned that the person on the team should be trustworthy and can be counted upon not to quit when things go bad. John Mark did not fit the bill as he had a lousy track record. After failing once, Barnabas felt that he needed another opportunity to renew himself. The result of the disagreement saw them splitting into two teams.
In all conflicts it is important to remember these 4 things that goes by these alphabets:
R-espect each other. Regard this person as a brother/sister in the Lord. Keep this in mind that "I may be wrong" and respond when another extends peace to us.
E-xpress: communicate and help eacah other express emotions appropriately without having to attack the other. This is better than keeping it in and exploding at another time.
L-isten: Ask the other to help us understand rather than choose to be used by others in the conflict.
C-larify: Did I understand you correctly? Is this the concern that you have?
On hindsight, the conflict ended well. The relationship between the two healed and they were able to go many more places. In the second missionary journey, Paul and Silas were both thrown into prison and they were able to praise God behind bars. We are not too sure how John Mark would have reacted under those circumstances. What we do know is that Barnabas brought John Mark to Cyprus and discipled him so well that when Paul was about to face death, he asked to have John Mark come alongside him in 2 Timothy. The man who was previously useless had become useful. Something changed. Paul was able to acknowledge it. A person's failure is not fatal or final when there are people who are matured who can bring out the best from him/her. It is to John Mark's credit that his gospel was the earliest of the 4 gospels to be circulated, documenting the life and ministry of Christ.
God is sovereign and he works through all. There is no excuse to say, 不爽就走。Is this the posture of our hearts? How do you want to respond? Do we want to miss the way God matures us and nurtures us through conflict? When Christians disagree, there are 4 important ways of carrying on with the ministry:
1. Pray for Guidance
2. Search the Scriptures, do not jump to conclusions.
3. Seek Godly counsel, people who are more experienced and insightful.
4. Ask for specific directions?
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